Why do victims wait so long to report child molestation?

The American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry estimates 80,000 incidents of childhood sexual abuse are reported each year, and a greater number go unreported.1

People who haven't lived with the horrors of child molestation may find it very difficult to understand why someone would wait twenty or thirty years before reporting the crimes to authorities. Victims have stayed silent for many reasons, often a combination of factors.

They are told not to tell Child molesters convince their victims to "keep our little secret" in a number of devious ways. The victims are told that they'll get into trouble, that no one will believe them, and sometimes more heinously, that the abuser will harm another family member if the child tells. Small wonder that the young victims become such good keepers of secrets.

They don't know they can get help
Today, many children are educated early-on to report "inappropriate touching" to a parent, teacher, school nurse, or the police. In the 1950s and 1960s, however, children were not encouraged to talk about "such things." They lived in a "don't ask - don't tell" society, and buried their feelings, in order to survive.

They are afraid they will not be believed
Sadly, especially when reporting incest to another relative, a child is often not believed. Mothers simply do not want to hear of such vile deeds perpetrated by a husband or son. Unless the child victim goes on to report the crimes to someone outside the family, they simply give up, thinking "no one really cares."

They assume the shame for themselves
Child molesters are manipulative and take advantage of the burden of self-guilt and shame that most victims of pedophiles grow up with.

They repress or dissociate
Memories of the abuse thrust upon the victim are so horrific that the young mind can't deal with them, and "zones out." These memories are repressed, and often do not surface until many years later, if ever.

They "transcend" their abuse
Unfortunately, many victims of child sexual abuse become drug and alcohol users, or relive their abuse through promiscuity - thus "transcending" the abuse by another into self-abuse. The resultant psychological problems, such as PTSD or Bipolar Disorder become so severe that the victims become paralyzed to act, if they remain untreated.

They are embarrassed to come forward
Adult victims who have survived do not want to "rock the boat" of their relatively normal lives by risking the publicity of a trial. They fear the smirks and knowing looks some people still give when the subject of child molestation arises, and it is easier just to continue with the "status quo" of their lives.

They are prohibited from reporting by outdated statute of limitations laws
Ironically, many victims, once they have reached the psychological and emotional stage where they feel comfortable in reporting those old crimes against their innocence, find that old dinosaur statutes of limitations prohibit them from doing so. It was exactly this reason that compelled the California legislature to revise its laws governing the prosecution of cases involving sexual acts against children. Other states have also relaxed statutes of limitations for such crimes.